The body becomes a laboratory for sensory experiments. By exploring every millimetre, we are more present in the moment. You also explain in your book that the artificial allows a return to the natural. What can we actually do to achieve this? Is creating a special atmosphere important? Putting up a framework is useful and allows creativity; it helps to leave room for improvisation — a bath, a massage, a dance… Blindfolding the eyes can also help remove a large part of the mental stimulation and control.
As a couple, you can, for example, decide to spend time together with a condition: Being active at all points is reassuring, in that it provides a sense of being able to maintain control over the situation. But when you are tense, you are restricted; you contain all your energy. Slowing down allows you to discover new sensations connected to the body, emotions and feelings — not just your own, but also those of the other person. We are thus detached from everyday life, and the endless list of mundane things to do. As a result, we no longer have to stick to the same mechanical performances. Interview by Fabienne Broucaret. This defuses the habitual routine, allows you to avoid the norms, and instead make discoveries. Deciding to slow down is one thing, getting there is another. Conversely, when there is no particular expectation, you are relaxed, you are open, you are free. Is this not contradictory? By relaxing, we are fully present in each moment and we put ourselves in the best place to allow authentic feelings to happen. You also explain in your book that the artificial allows a return to the natural. Mobilise all our senses and allow yourself to be guided by your body. Putting up a framework is useful and allows creativity; it helps to leave room for improvisation — a bath, a massage, a dance… Blindfolding the eyes can also help remove a large part of the mental stimulation and control. By exploring every millimetre, we are more present in the moment. The body becomes a laboratory for sensory experiments. Is creating a special atmosphere important? We get lost, we stroll, we make detours. No, not at all. Desire and pleasure do not only happen as a result of excitement and sexual drive, as many movies suggest. This requires successfully breaking away from the obsession with result and performance… Making love directed towards a specific goal, like an orgasm, just results in missing a lot of other things along the way. What can we actually do to achieve this? It is the decision to letting instead of making it happen. This leaves no choice but to leave yourself to the sensations and pleasures of the body.
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