Unlike men's main sexual complaint, erectile dysfunction , women's biggest sexual problem is caused by a combination of both mental and physical factors, which aren't likely to be cured by merely popping a pill. It feels too regressive, too incestuous," says Perel. Almost one in three men report premature ejaculation , while under one in five are worried about performance, according to Laumann. Frequency is not the only measure of libido. Take pleasure in the details - get your partner a little gift, put on your favorite music from college days, turn off the phones and hire a babysitter to take the kids out to a long movie so there will be no interruptions. In the first instance, get some sleep. Addressing underlying medical conditions. If an oral contraceptive is suspected as the culprit in lowering testosterone levels, a different formulation or nonhormonal birth control methods may be prescribed.
For the first time, this study looks at the effect of the testosterone patches in naturally menopausal women as well as those who have undergone surgical or early menopause caused by chemotherapy or removal of their ovaries. So can tranquilizers and blood pressure medications. It also helps explain why many supplements claim to be effective in treating sexual problems, such as low sexual desire. Though difficult to define precisely, Laumann measures it as follows: But experts say research into women's sexual function is slowly catching up in the post-Viagra era. Performance Anxiety and Loss of Libido Men report two major problems -- anxiety about performance and climaxing too early, according to Laumann. Blood levels of androgens fall continuously in women as they age. Because expectations play such a large role in sexual desire, over-the-counter products may claim that they're effective, but it's likely just a placebo effect. Be pleasure oriented, not goal oriented. Where sexual satisfaction is concerned, the shortest distance between two points - from arousal to orgasm -- is not necessarily a straight line to the genitals. Keep Expectations Real It may take the pressure off performance anxiety to bear in mind that not every sexual encounter has to be perfect. Sex does not give you feelings of connection and sharing. Erectile Dysfunction Causes Loss of Libido Impotence, or ED, erectile dysfunction , is not the same as loss of libido, but when you experience one, sooner or later you are likely to feel the other as well. What Is Low Sexual Desire? And the anxiety doesn't stop there. It also helps to understand that it's normal for erections to come and go during lovemaking -- "It can happen two to five times in a minute sexual session," McCarthy says. Loss of libido also makes men more unhappy about the rest of their lives than it does women. Sex is mechanical and routine. When intimacy collapses into fusion, it is not lack of closeness but too much closeness that impedes desire. Stress Leads to Loss of Libido Job stress and self-esteem are also big factors. She says that until recently, the only studies on women's sexual issues were very small, often short-term, and rarely well designed. Partner performance problems, lack of emotional satisfaction with the relationship, the birth of a child, and becoming a caregiver for a loved one can decrease sexual desire. Reclaiming Your Sexual Self: Medical problems contributing to low sexual desire may require surgical treatment, such as the removal of painful fibroids or medication. Focusing on the other erogenous zones can ease performance pressure - and add new pleasure.
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