As I recently explained to another user, the hymen is to the vagina as a front door is to the screen door that is just in front of it, if you follow. But over time, the more clear physiological realities became, more and more people started figuring out that that was an error. And we can all agree, I think, that a woman who is in labor is not a virgin. In other words, it's a bit of an oxymoron to suggest you can lose your virginity before you have sex with someone else, because the way virginity is most often defined is AS having sex with someone else. To avoid it, we recommend that people take sexual activity slowly, that women be fully aroused before they have penetrative sex, that you use lots of condom-safe lube and condoms , and that you stop if it hurts. Ultimately, know that if and when you choose a sexual partner , sex makes everyone feel pretty vulnerable:
My friend Hanne Blank, in researching her book on virginity, even found a case of a woman who gave birth with a partial hymen intact, and it remained intact through her childbirth, believe it or not! Ultimately, know that if and when you choose a sexual partner , sex makes everyone feel pretty vulnerable: In other words, it's a bit of an oxymoron to suggest you can lose your virginity before you have sex with someone else, because the way virginity is most often defined is AS having sex with someone else. For starters, the hymen isn't several inches into the vagina. If you're a few inches into your vagina with your fingers and feeling some resistance or an "end" you're likely either just pushing against one of your vaginal walls or you ARE at the end of your vagina: When it is present, fully or partially, it is, instead, RIGHT at the vaginal opening , its edges attached just inside that opening. In other words, the bodies of "virgins" and the bodies of "non-virgins" are often impossible to tell the difference between. I am a virgin, and I really want to lose it myself before I actually have sex because it is embarassing that I still have my virginity and i'm We start out with fully intact hymens at birth, and they stay that way, for the most part, until around puberty , when they start gradually wearing away, due to a host of things: And we can all agree, I think, that a woman who is in labor is not a virgin. When people are talking about "popping a cherry" they're usually referring to tearing a hymen. When a woman gets sexually aroused or excited, the vagina "tents," -- balloons to become deeper and wider, and the cervix pulls back. But over time, the more clear physiological realities became, more and more people started figuring out that that was an error. Whether or not you bleed has nothing to do with whether you were a "virgin" when you first had penetrative intercourse. Too, the hymen isn't something that needs to be popped or broken before or during vaginal sex. Regardless, if you're putting clean! If you still have a partial hymen since you're sticking your fingers inches into your vagina, we can be very sure that, at best, it's partial for you -- a fully intact hymen would prevent the entry of your fingers at all , you can sit with a hand mirror and even see it right for yourself. Back in the day when people didn't understand women's bodies -- and in some places and groups still, because some folks are still ignorant to what the realities of women's bodies are -- virginity was defined as being all about the hymen when there were and in some places, again, there still are, however misguided cultural imperatives to try and "prove" a woman's virginity. Some women bleed during their first intercourse; other women don't. It doesn't "pop" or "break" at all, generally, unless you're talking about someone pretty forcibly entering the vagina of someone pretty young: Most women are born with hymens, but the hymen doesn't usually completely cover the opening to the vagina. Even once it's worn all the way away, there's usually a little bit of that tissue that will always remain just inside the vaginal opening. That's where the whole "popping the cherry" myth comes from. Sometimes that term "popping the cherry" is just a euphamism for someone having sex -- or doing anything new -- for the first time. Other times women bleed during first intercourse because they were not aroused enough and thus friction created small tears in their vaginal tissue, or because they were nicked with a fingernail during manual sex. Here are a few extra links that should help you out with all of this:
Video about pop my cherry with sex:
"Cherry Popping" (Hymen Myths)
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